45 Awesome Couch Puns For Kids

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Ready for some awesome puns? These couch puns for kids are the perfect one liners. While these couch puns may be a little corny they are guaranteed to make you have a good laugh.

feature image: couch puns for kids with an image of a laughing couch

Funny Couch Jokes and Puns

Puns, jokes, and relaxation are the secret sauce to the perfect afternoon! That’s why we are so excited to share these couch puns for kids with you! You are sure to really crack up as you share these with others!

So grab these funny couch puns for endless laughs all day long! And Don’t worry they are family friendly so there is no sinking deeper into the couch when you hear them!

Love puns? Be sure to check out our chocolate puns for kids and our swimming puns!

Do your kids love jokes?

Grab these fun joke cards for them to laugh at all the time! These make great lunch box jokes, joke card series, bedtime laughs, and more!

Grab your set now! There are over 50+ pages of jokes included! This is a digital download, so it is easy! Just download, print, and enjoy!

pin image: couch puns for kids with an image of a laughing couch

Funny Couch Puns

I said to my psychiatrist I keep thinking I’m a dog

He said, “get on the couch please.”

I said, “I’m not allowed on the couch.”

I have been trying to think of another relevant joke but have had no luck sofa.

Bought a new recliner sofa.

Apparently if I don’t like it, I can take it back.

Bought a new sofa recently and it comes with three years free credit.

Great news for my phone bill.
 
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I found a universal remote control down the back of the sofa,

I thought to myself “this changes everything”.

What does ET stand for?

Because someone took his sofa.

A friend failed his Sofa Exam.

He’s going to resit.

One of my best childhood memories was falling asleep on the sofa…

…and waking up in bed thinking “wow, I can teleport”.

A man walks into a furniture shop in Glasgow and sits on a sofa.

A chap working there says “Comfy?”, the man says “Paisley”.

When I heard my sofa had been stolen,

I thought “I’m not going to take this sitting down”.
couch puns for kids:When I heard my sofa had been stolen, I thought “I’m not going to take this sitting down”. on a brown background

Someone stole my sofa.

Thankfully it was recovered.

Heard about someone addicted to eating sofas.

He’s got a suite tooth.

Q: Finally I can see things far away without leaving the couch

A: I got tele-vision

Q: Why do drummers make terrible couch salespeople?

A: They charge per cushion.

I just lost 20% of my couch

Ouch!

Q: What do you call a nut that fell out of your bowl and rolled under the couch?

A: AWOL nut.

I tried to order a table from IKEA, but I misplaced an umlaut in my search text. I got a couch instead.

So close, yet sofa.

I was just sitting on the couch when my friend tells me, “your not even listening to me.”

I thought that’s a very weird way to start a conversation.

Q: What should you absolutely NEVER name a couch store?

A: Sofa Kingdom

Once, I agreed to help Death move his couch to his new place.

After we got there, I realized I forgot those things you’re supposed to sit on. There were reaper cushions.
couch puns for kids:Once, I agreed to help Death move his couch to his new place. After we got there, I realized I forgot those things you’re supposed to sit on. There were reaper cushions. on a brown background

I painted my couch so you don’t see it.

Nobody has noticed sofa.

Q: What is the difference between a cat on a couch and a dim witted cow?

A: One is a cat loaf and the other is a cattle oaf.

Q: What do you call a couch potato that smokes a lotta weed?

A: Fries.

I was laying on the couch and my fiancé said “I thought you said you were interesting”

I said no honey, I said I was into resting.

Turn any couch into a sofabed,

by forgetting your wife’s birthday.
 
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I’m studying the meaning of couches in a certain part of America.

It’s really Phillysofacal.

I’m moving some couches today…

Sofa, so good!

Q: What do blind folks call couches

A: Painful, because they can’t c.

I’m attracted to all couches…

…guess that makes me pansectional

Q: What do you call a couch, chair, and table made out of plants?

A: Ferniture.
couch puns for kids:Once, What do you call a couch, chair, and table made out of plants? A: Ferniture. on a brown background

Q: What do couch potatoes evolve into?

A: Computer chips.

My friend asked me if I wanted to buy the couch.

I said, “I’ll sleep on it.”

Q: Why couldn’t the potato get off the couch?

A: Because it was baked.

Q: Why was the couch afraid of the chair?

A: The chair was armed.

The best part about Netflix is there are no commercials.

On an unrelated note, does anyone know how to get urine stains out of a couch?

My buddy asked me if he could crash on my couch tonight.

I had to explain to him that i am married now, and that’s where I sleep

Q: What’s the difference between a guitar player and a couch?

A: A couch can support a family.

Q: What does that couch have in common with your mom?

A: Both of them are supportive.

Q: What does the sofa say when you jump on it?

A: COUCH!
couch puns for  What does the sofa say when you jump on it? A: COUCH! on a gray background

Has anyone’s gardening skills improved during the quarantine?

I planted myself on the couch in August and have grown significantly since.

I said “Son, did you eat the ice cream in the freezer?”

He said “No, I ate it on the couch.”

You know my dad calls our couch?

The Kid Napping Machine

Q: How did the drummer sell their couch?

A: Per cushion.

Do you have some favorite couch puns for kids? Share them in the comments so we can add them to the list!

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How Do I Access My Joke Cards?

Fill in the form above. You will receive an email in your inbox. If you don’t see it check your spam folder! You will then click to confirm your subscription. Once confirmed, you will be taken to Airtable (a different website) where all our free printables will be waiting for you! It is free to sign up for Air Table!

How Do I Print A PDF?

You’ll need a program that supports PDFs. Adobe Acrobat is a great option. Open the program, click file, then print. Select your printer and the number of copies you want to print. Be sure you click double-sided if you want it to print on both sides. 

Can I Resell These?

You may not resell any printable that you find on our website or in our resource library. You may use them for class parties, at church, at home, or in the classroom. You may get these printed at an office supply store or copy center at your own expense.

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