105 Fish Puns

If you’re looking for a good laugh, then look no further than these fish puns. They’re sure to put a smile on your face and brighten up your day.

Red cardstock with light blue fish and blue fins.

Fish Puns

You may be questioning what exactly is a pun. Puns are a form of wordplay that take advantage of words that have multiple meanings, or words that sound similar to other words. They can be humorous and clever and are often used when telling a joke or cheering someone up. If you want to check out more puns be sure to read our 125 Birthday Puns and 255+ Bro Puns that are Bro-Tastic! they are sure to entertain.

Dark blue cardstock with blue fish and yellow scales and fins.

Fish Puns

Q: How do fish with difficulty hearing communicate? Piscine language.
Q: Did you hear about the fight in that restaurant? Four fish were battered!
Q: Which fish go to heaven? Angelfish.
Q: Why did the fish get bad grades? Because it was below sea level.
Q: Where do sick fish go? To see a sturgeon.

Lime green fish with blue scales and light blue and green fins. On white cardstock with a navy blue border.

Q: Why did the little boy not eat his sushi? Because it looked too fishy.
Q: What’s the difference between a lawyer and a fish? One is a scum-sucking scavenger; the other is just a fish.
Q: If a fish got the main role in a movie, what would it be called? Starfish.
Q: How does a school of fish keep up to date about sea life? They listen to the current news.
Q: Why did the woman make tons of fish-eye soup? Because it will see her through the week.

Q: How do you tuna fish? Adjust their scales.
Q: How do you keep a fish from smelling? Chop of its nose.
Q: Why did the fish blush? Because he saw the boat’s bottom.
Q: Why did the teenage fish get told off in school? Because he was talking on his shell phone.
Q: Why did the fish get detention? Because he was being too shellfish.
Q: What did the fish say to his girlfriend? Your plaice or mine?
Q: What did the fish say to his girlfriend when they split up? I’m outta this plaice!
Q: Did you hear about the illiterate fisherman? He was lost at C.
Q: What happens when you mix a fish and a banker? A loan shark.
Q: How do you make an octopus laugh? Give it ten-tickles.

Q: Where did Noah keep all of the fish? In the multi-story carp ark.
Q: Why should you never fight an octopus? Because he’s too well armed.
Q: What did the fish say when his relationship started to flounder? Halibut we chat about it?
Q: What does a fish wear to keep warm? A shoal!
Q: Why is a fisherman so stingy? Because his work made him sell-fish.

Orange clownfish with yellow stripes. Orange and brown fins all on white cardstock with a navy blue border.

Q: What did the romantic fisherman want? A gill-friend.
Q: Why are fish so smart? They live in schools.
Q: Why did the fish blush? Because the sea-weed!
Q: Who do fish pray to? Cod Almighty.
Q: Why do fish swim in schools? Because they can’t walk.

Q: What fish travels 100 mph? A motor pike.
Q: What’s the laziest fish in the world? A Kipper.
Q: Why did the shopkeeper through the clams out? They were past their shell-by-date.
Q: Why will fish never take responsibility? Because it’s always salmon else’s fault.
Q: Why is it so easy to weigh a fish? Because they have their own scales.
Q: What type of instrument do fish love to play? A bass drum.
Q: Where do fish store their money? In a river bank.
Q: Why did the fish start a charity? He was reely good at findraising.
Q: Why don’t fish go into business together They are always sole traders.
Q: What makes fish terrible journalists? They always spread hake news.

Q: What did the fish take to work? A b-reef-case.
Q: What type of music is best to listen to while fishing? Something catchy!
Q: Why do fish always lose their court cases? They are always gill-ty.
Q: Why can’t fish have romantic relationships? They are scared of intima-sea.
Q: Why are fish so lucky? They seize every oppor-tuna-ty.

Lime green and orange fish with orange scales and green and orange fins. On white cardstock with a navy blue border.

Q: What did Dorothy the fish say? There’s no plaice like home.
Q: Why do fish companies never work? They always have to scale back.
Q: Why do fish not go to war? Because they are paci-fish-ts.
Q: What did the fish say when everyone left his party? Tanks for coming!
Q: Why was the fish at the carnival? She was a fortuna teller!

Q: Why did the fish go on the bachelor? To meet the gill of his dreams.
Q: Where do blow fish work? The balloon factory.
Q: Why did the fisherman go to the casino? To plaice a bait!
Q: Hey, have you heard from Nemo? No, maybe you should throw him a line.
Q: Why do people like caviar? Because they have so-fish-ticated taste.
Q: Why did the fish get sick? It caught salmonella.
Q: Why can’t fisherman make it as boxers? They can only throw hooks.
Q: Have you ever seen a clownfish? Yeah, he was not really all that finny.
Q: Did you hear about the newly wed goldfish? Yes, they are golden and swimming along nicely.
Q: What is a fish’s worse day of the week? Fry day.
Q: How do mussels take photos? With clam-eras.
Q: Did you know that fishing is harmful to our ecosystem? Please do not gilltrip me.
Q: How come fish are so good at charity work? They are good at fin-draising!
Q: Who is your favorite actor? Leonardio DeCarpio.
Q: Why did the fish want to be an astronaut? So he could go to trouterspace.

Q: What does the fish say to himself every morning before work? Carp-e diem.
Q: Why does this fish taste funny? Because it is clownfish.
Q: Why was the guppy upset? Because of all the fish-cious rumours going around at school.
Q: Why did the fisherman leave his job at Wall Street? Because the stock market took a dive.
Q: Who is your favorite member of the Fish band? The Bass-ist!
Q: Have you tried that new seafood restaurant? Yes, I am hooked.
Q: Which fish will swim faster? Not sure, why don’t we plaice a bait!
Q: Why was the shark angry about leaving the restaurant early? Because he couldn’t even fin-ish his meal.
Q: Why are most fish single? They have fin-timacy issues.
Q: What is a sharks favorite drink? A caramel moki-atto.

Q: Why do you never see a fish on Facebook? Because they are scared of the net!
Q: Why did the shark go to prison? He was gill-ty.
Q: What did the fish say in his vows? That he will love his wife for a gill-ion years through thick and fin.
Q: Why couldn’t the fish sing? He was tuna-deaf.
Q: Have you tried the Calamari at that new restaurant? Yes, it is ex-squid-sit.
Q: When do fish sign contracts? After they mullet over!
Q: Where do fish come from? Finland!
Q: Why was the shark so angry? Because he forgot to have his morning ca-fin.
Q: Why did the fish file for divorce? Because her husband was shell-fish and was not roe-mantic anymore.
Q: Cod you tell me a fish joke? Sorry, I bass-icaly cod none.

Q: Why did the guppy get bad grades? Because it was below sea level.
Q: What is a fishes favorite TV show? Tuna half men.
Q: What kind of music do fishermen love? Something catchy.
Q: What makes an octopus laugh? All it takes is ten-tickles.
Q: How come fish are so smart? They live in schools!
Q: What do you call a fish without any eyes? A fsh.
Q: Where do shrimp go when they are in desperate need for some cash? The prawn shop.
Q: Do you like fish puns? I heard they are eely eely bad.
Q: How do you tell a fish to settle? You need to tell them to clam down.
Q: What did the fish parents say when their guppy graduated school? Our little gill is growing up.

Q: Why did the fish break up with his girlfriend? He had no fin left to give.
Q: Why did the Mariana Snailfish break up with her boyfriend? Because their relationship had taken a bit of a dive.
Q: What is a fish’s favorite pick up line? Your plaice, or mine?
Q: Why don’t fish like social media? Because of all the trawls.
Q: Why did the fish win the dance competition? Because he was flippin’ fantastic!
Q: What do you call a fish that is an actor? The starfish!
Q: How many gold fish does it take to screw a light bulb? None, they just call the electric eel.
Q: Why was the fish late to work? He forgot his b-reef-case.
Q: Why did the fish get fired from his last job? They were scaling back.
Q: What did the fish say when it ran into a wall? Dam.

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105 Fish Puns

Fish Puns

Fish Puns

Love Puns? Check these out:

Don’t forget to subscribe to our email list so that you know when we add more great jokes to the site that will leave you laughing for hours!

How Do I Access My Joke Cards?

How Do I Print A PDF?

Can I Resell These?

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