Thanksgiving is a holiday that is all about family, food, and fun. And what says “fun” more than some Thanksgiving puns? Whether you’re enjoying your feast or just waiting for Black Friday deals, here are a few jokes to keep you in the spirit of the season!
Thanksgiving Puns
Thanksgiving is coming up soon, and that means it’s time to start thinking about all the puns you’re going to use to make everyone laugh. Puns are a great way to lighten the mood when everyone is hustling in the kitchen, prepping the food for the big meal. So as you baking your pies, and stuffing your turkey, maybe that is when you should be sharing some of these great thanksgiving puns. Love these puns; check out our thanksgiving jokes for kids.
I like to even print out joke cards for the kid’s table and let them have some great conversations as they share jokes and enjoy some quality family time together. If you are ready to get your laugh on and enjoy being with your family then check out our favorite Thanksgiving puns to help get you started!
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The Best Thanksgiving Puns
- “Piece out.” (As you take off with leftover pie)
- “I can’t quit cold-turkey.”
- “I was planning on taking home leftovers, but all my plans were foiled.”
- “Feast today, for tomorrow, we shop!”
- That was plucking hilarious!
- Enough with the prelude and let’s get stuffed.
- You know I’m all about that baste.
- It’s time to get basted!
- Oh my gourdness, I plucking love fall.
- The goal is to gobble until you wobble.
- Let’s get the gourd times rolling.
- Eat, drink, and cranberry!
- Getting the longer half of the wishbone is a snap.
- Family, friends, food – it doesn’t get any butter than this.
- You think I’m done? Honey, you ain’t seen stuffing yet.
- We can worry about the Christmas tree some other time. Tonight is all about the poul-tree.
- Green bean casserole, pumpkin pie, mashed potatoes – when it’s Thanksgiving, there’s always more than just one side to the story.
- This celebration is totally my jam.
- I only have pies for you.
- Hey, I just met you, and this is gravy. But here’s my stuffing, so carve me maybe.
- Yeah, sure, abs are great. But have you ever had pumpkin pie?
- It’s all fun and games until your pant buttons come undone.
- I’m tired of eating Thanksgiving left overs for weeks after the celebration. That’s not happening this year – I’m quitting cold turkey.
- Thanksgiving is wonderful because people tend to spend less time talking when their mouths are stuffed with food.
- If you don’t want to sit at the kids’ table during Thanksgiving dinner, then you probably haven’t watched the Hunger Games.
- They should change the Thanksgiving name to something more appropriate, like the Turkeypocalypse.
- Do you think there’s life after Thanksgiving, asked one turkey to another.
- “Let’s give ’em pumpkin’ to talk about.”
- “I’m all about that baste.”
- “Activate Feast Mode.”
- “Don’t marsh my mellow.”
- “You’ve really got your turk cut out for you.”
- “You’re the belle of the (Butter)ball.”
- “Why did the chef refuse to crack an egg? He didn’t want to whisk it.”
- “Baking is my cardio.”
- “They see me rollin’, they hatin’.”
- Turkin’ 9 to 5
- Turkey trot like it’s hot.
- “Hey I just met you, and this is gravy, but here’s my stuffing, so carve me maybe.”
- “My family told me to stop telling Thanksgiving jokes, but I said I couldn’t quit cold turkey.”
- “Gobble ’til you wobble.”
- “Getting the longer part of the wishbone is a snap.”
- “We’ll worry about the Christmas tree later. Today it’s all about the poul-tree.”
- “Don’t make Thanksgiving a cluster-pluck”
- “What do you call a running turkey?” “Fast food.”
- “Why did the cranberry turn red?” “Because he saw the turkey dressing!”
- “What sound does a turkey’s phone make?” “Wing, wing, wing.”
- “Turkey, gravy, beans, and rolls. Let me see that casserole.”
- “Wham, yam, thank you ma’am.”
- “Much ado about stuffing.”
- “Stop, drop, and pass the rolls!”
- “It doesn’t get butter than this.”
- “Bread-y or not, here I crumb.”
- “Eat, drink, and cranberry.”
- “Pour some gravy on me.”
- “Nobody puts gravy in the corner.”
- “You ain’t seen stuffing yet.”
- “#SquashGoals”
- “Life’s gourd, and then you pie.”
- “Whatever floats your gravy boat.”
- “I only have pies for you.”
- “I pecan’t even.” (Oh, yes, you pe-can.)
- “Let’s give them pumpkin to talk about”
- “Whip, whip, hooray.”
- “When I whip, you whip, we whip…”
- “I like big Bundts and I cannot lie.”
- “My favorite actor is Robert Brownie Jr.”
- “Sure, abs are great, but have you ever had pumpkin pie?”
- “Let’s get basted.”
- “Let’s get sauced.”
- “You had me at merlot.”
- “Sip happens.”
- “What does a grape say when it gets stepped on?” “Nothing, it just lets out a little wine.”
- “Oh my gourd, I ate too much.”
- “Baste. Thanksgiving. Ever.”
- “Silence of the yams.”
- “That was plucking delicious!”
- “It’s all fun and games until you have to unbutton your pants.”
Thanksgiving Jokes We Love!
Q: How did the turkey escape Thanksgiving alive?
A: He stayed ahead of the carve.
Q: What are turkey butchers haunted by?
A: Poultrygeists.
Q: What role do green beans have in Thanksgiving dinner?
A: The casserole!
Leftovers?
Leftovers are for quitters, and we ain’t quitters.
Q: Why did the turkey cross the road?
A: Because it was Thanksgiving and he wanted to get out of sight.
Q: What do turkeys eat for dessert?
A: Peach gobbler.
Q: Why did the cranberries turn red?
A: Because they saw the turkey dressing.
Q: Why do pilgrims’ pants never stay up?
A: Because their belt buckles are on their hats.
Q: What did the turkey say to the computer voice recognition?
A: “Google, Google, Google.”
Q: What do you get when you cross a turkey with a centipede?
A: Unlimited drumstick buffet!
Q: What did the turkey tell the hunter on Thanksgiving day?
A: “Quack quack!”
Q: What’s the key to a successful Thanksgiving celebration?
A: Tur-key!
Q: Why did the police take the turkey in for questioning?
A: He sense fowl play.
Q: What sound does a turkey make when you take its legs?
A: “Wobble, wobble!”
Q: What’s the difference between a pirate and a cranberry farmer?
A: A pirate buries his treasure, while a cranberry farmer treasures his berries.
Q: What do you call a turkey on the day after Thanksgiving?
A: Lucky.
Q: What do you call a love story between a pilgrim and a turkey?
A: 50 Shades of Gravy
Q: What do you call it when a group of people take turns making fun of the thanksgiving turkey?
A: A roast.
Q: What’s the best music to play at Thanksgiving dinner?
A: Plymouth Rock.
Q: What dessert do mathematicians prefer to eat during Thanksgiving?
A: Pumpkin pi.
Q: Why didn’t the chef add any spices to her Thanksgiving roast?
A: She didn’t have the thyme.
Q: What did the pilgrim call his friends?
A: His pal-grims.
Q: What’s the best dance step to use at a Thanksgiving party?
A: Twerky.
Q: Did you know that the pilgrims came over on smoke-colored ships designed by a guy named Valentine?
A: You might call them gray V-boats.
Q: What’s the most appropriate outfit for Thanksgiving dinner?
A: A har-vest.
Q: What do turkeys eat on Thanksgiving?
A: Nothing – they’re too stuffed.
Q: What happened to the turkey when he got into a fist fight?
A: He got the stuffing knocked out of him.
Q: Why did the pilgrims avoid telling their secrets while they were in the cornfields?
A: Because the corn had ears.
Q: Why did the turkey refuse to play any instrument other than the drums?
A: Because he already had the drumsticks for it.
Q: If a large turkey is called a gobbler, what do you call the smaller ones?
A: Goblets.
Q: What do Halloween and Thanksgiving have in common?
A: Gobble-ins!
Knock knock.
Normal Lee, I don’t eat this much!
Who’s there?
Normal Lee.
Normal Lee who?
Knock knock.
Tamara, we’re having turkey leftovers for sure.
Who’s there?
Tamara.
Tamara who?
Knock, knock.
Arthur any leftovers?
Who’s there?
Arthur.
Arthur who?
Q: What did the turkey say before he was popped into the oven?
A: “Boy, am I stuffed!”
Q: What is a pumpkin’s favorite sport?
A: Squash
Q: What would you get if you crossed Halloween with Thanksgiving?
A: A poultry-geist.
Q: What did the mommy turkey say to her baby turkeys?
A: “if your father could see you now, he would be turning in his gravy.”
Q: What do you call it when it rains turkeys?
A: Fowl weather.
Q: Why can’t you take a turkey to church?
A: Because they use fowl language.
Q: If fruit comes from fruit trees, where do turkeys come from?
A: Poul-trees.
Q: Why did the turkey let out a scream?
A: Because he was caught dressing.
Q: Which side of the turkey has the most feathers?
A: The outside.
Q: What smells the best on Thanksgiving day?
A: Your nose.
Q: What happens when you teach a turkey to play the harp?
A: You get a turkey that can pluck on its own.
Q: If the pilgrims were still around today, what would they be best known for?
A: Their age.
Q: What’s blue and covered in feathers?
A: A turkey holding its breath.
Q: Why didn’t the pilgrim want to make the Thanksgiving bread?
A: He thought it was a crumby job.
Q: What’s the easiest recipe for pumpkin pie?
A: Simple – just divide the pumpkin’s circumference by its diameter.
Q: What did the obstetrician say while she was cooking Thanksgiving dinner?
A: “The turkey’s dilated to 2.5 inches, we’ve got crowning stuffing, it’s time to eat!”
Q: Why was the Thanksgiving band unable to play their set?
A: Because someone ate the drumsticks.
Q: You think you’re crazy about Thanksgiving?
A: Turkeys literally lose their heads at that time of year.
Q: How can you tell the difference between a female and a male turkey?
A: The male turkey is usually the one holding the remote.
Q: What do musicians put on their turkey during Thanksgiving dinner?
A: Groovy.
Q: What did the little baby corn as her momcorn?
A: Will popcorn come?
Q: How did Albert Einstein celebrate Thanksgiving?
A: He always tried to remember what he was thinkful for.
Q: What do you call cranberries when they’re not happy?
A: Blue berries.
Q: What type of cracker would pilgrims use for their smores?
A: A pilgraham cracker.
Q: What would happen if you combined Thanksgiving and Easter?
A: Feaster Sunday.
Q: Why did the pilgrim eat the candle off of the Thanksgiving table?
A: He wanted a light snack before dinner.
Q: What did the small turkeys tell the big turkey bully?
A: Peck on someone your own size!
Q: What do you get after eating too much turkey, stuffing, and sides than you can handle?
A: You get dessert, of course.
Q: What does a turkey with 6 legs taste like?
A: No one knows, they’re hard to catch.
Q: Why do we have Thanksgiving holiday?
A: So we know when we need to get started on Christmas shopping.
Q: Why was the Thanksgiving soup so darn expensive?
A: It had 24 carrots.
Q: When is the best time to serve a tofu turkey?
A: At Pranksgiving.
Q: What did the turkey tell the man who was trying to shoot him?
A: Liberty, Equality, and Bad Aim for all.
Q: What sounds to turkeys make when they’re in outerspace?
A: Hubble, Hubble, Hubble.
Q: How do turkeys drink their sparkling cider?
A: Inside gobblets.
Q: What’s one good reason you should save leftover turkey for tomorrow?
A: So it doesn’t go to waist.
Q: What’s one thing we can all be thankful for on Thanksgiving?
A: That we’re not turkeys.
Q: Where’s one country where Thanksgiving is never celebrated?
A: Turkey!
Q: If April showers bring May flowers, what do May flower bring?
A: Pilgrims.
Q: Why did little Johnny get such low grades after Thanksgiving?
A: Because everything is marked down after the holidays.
Q: What do you call a dumb, dried out gobbler?
A: A jerky turkey.
Q: What has feathers and webbed feet?
A: A turkey getting ready to go scuba diving.
Q: What kind of vegetable would be the best for Thanksgiving dinner?
A: Beets me!
Q: How can you make a turkey float?
A: Well, you start out with root beer, vanilla ice cream, and a turkey.
Q: What’s the best way to keep a turkey in suspense?
A: I’ll let you know next week.
Do you have other favorite Thanksgiving puns? Leave them in the comments so we can add them to the list!
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