60 Watermelon Jokes For Kids That Are So Juicy!

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Looking for some juicy jokes to tell your friends and family? Our clever watermelon jokes for kids are one in a melon! Grab these hilarious jokes today!

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What do jokes and watermelon have in common? They are both better when you share them with friends! You’ll love these sweet watermelon jokes for kids! These prize-winning jokes will turn everyone’s faces red with laughter! 

Our watermelon jokes for kids are clean and kid-friendly, so you won’t be feeling rotten when you hear your kids repeating them! They’ll be so excited to pick their favorite jokes and tell them again and again! For more fruity giggles, be sure to check out our banana jokes for kids, and enjoy these yummy cupcake jokes for kids, too! 

Do your kids love jokes?

Grab these fun joke cards for them to laugh at all the time! These make great lunch box jokes, joke card series, bedtime laughs, and more!

Grab your set now! There are over 50+ pages of jokes included! This is a digital download, so it is easy! Just download, print, and enjoy!

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The Best Watermelon Jokes for Kids

Q: Why are watermelons the saddest fruit?

A: Because they’re melon-cholic!
watermelon jokes for kids question: Why are watermelons the saddest fruit?  A: Because they're melon-cholic! on a red background

Q: What did the watermelon say to its boyfriend or girlfriend?

A: You’re one in a melon!

Q: A watermelon proposes to its sweetheart: “Honeydew want to get married?”

A: “Oh yes”, she replies, “but we cantaloupe!”

Q: What is the only time you start at the red and stop at the green? 

A: When you eat a watermelon!

Q: Why did the cantaloupe jump into the pool? 

A: It wanted to be a watermelon.

Q: How are a car and a bicycle similar? 

A: You can’t make watermelon juice out of either of them.

Q: I have a head like a watermelon, the arms like two baguettes, and the body of toilet paper – what am I? 

A: Banned from the supermarket!
 
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Q: How do you make a watermelon more watery? 

A: You have to plant it in the spring (a spring is a small river).

Q: If Jim has 15 watermelons and throws one at Mary, what does Mary have? 

A: A really bad headache!

Q: What do you call a girl with no arms, no legs, sitting in a watermelon patch? 

A: Melanie! (melon-y)
watermelon jokes for kids question: What do you call a girl with no arms, no legs, sitting in a watermelon patch? A: Melanie! (melon-y) on a black background

Q: What did the father cantaloupe say to his son? 

A: Watermelon! (Water-my-lawn)

Q: What do you call a melon that commits a crime? 

A: A water-fellon!

Q: A watermelon proposes to its sweetheart: “Honeydew want to get married?”

A: “Oh yes”, she replies, “but we cantaloupe!” 

Q: What did one watermelon say to the other on Valentine’s Day?

A: You’re one in a melon!

Q: Why was the teacher suspicious of the Watermelon during the exam?

A: She couldn’t really put her finger on it. He just looked a little seedy.

Q: Why do watermelons have fancy weddings?

A: Because they cantaloupe.

Q: What kind of summer camp would a toilet, a mountain lion, and a watermelon all go to?

A: A John Cougar Melon Camp. 

Q: What kind of fruit did Avogadro eat in the summer?

A: Watermolens!

Q: Why did the farmer plant a seed in his pond?

A: He was trying to grow a water-melon.

Q: Why did the watermelon go crazy?

A: He lost his rind. 
watermelon jokes for kids question: Why did the watermelon go crazy? A: He lost his rind.  on a yellow background

Q: What do you call a dog that herds watermelons?

A: A Melon Collie.

Q: What do you call a Mailman who only delivers watermelon?

A: Post Melone.

Q: Why are watermelons such good gossips?

A: They have all the juice.

Q: Why are watermelons such good entrepreneurs?

A: They always have seed money.

Q: Did you hear the joke about the watermelon?

A: It’s pit-iful!

Q: What do you have left after a pig eats a watermelon?

A: Pork rinds.

Q: What did the watermelon say to the honeydew when it proposed?

A: Sorry, I cantaloupe.

Q: Why shouldn’t you go into business with a watermelon?

A: They’re seedy.
 
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Q: You know what they say about when life gives you melons?

A: You might be dyslexic.

Q: John threw one watermelon at Tim, what does Tim have now?

A: A concussion.
watermelon jokes for kids question: John threw one watermelon at Tim, what does Tim have now? A: A concussion. on a green background

Q: What type of fruit has babies in a red house, a red house in a white house, and a white house in a green house?

A: A watermelon! 

Q: What do you call a serial killer watermelon?

A: A slaughter melon.

Q: What do you do if someone says an onion is the only food that can make them cry?

A: Throw a watermelon at their face.

Q: Why did one melon break up with the other melon?

A: He didn’t know water problem was.

Q: Why do watermelons take such a long time to make decisions?

A: They’re always melon it over.

Q: Did you hear about the guy who smashed all those fruits?

A: It was a slaughter melon.

Q: Did you hear about the watermelon who starred in a telanovella?

A: It was melondramatic.

Q: Why won’t anyone sit next to a watermelon?

A: They have a strange smelon.

Q: Do you know what you call the outside of a watermleon?

A: Rind of.

Q: Why did the watermelons ask for permission to get married?

A: Because they cantaloupe.
watermelon jokes for kids question: Why did the watermelons ask for permission to get married? A: Because they cantaloupe.  on a green background

Q: Why did the watermelon have brown spots all over its skin?

A: It had melonoma.

Q: Why did the watermelon get left at the altar?

A: Because his fiance cantelope.

Q: Why did the cantaloupe jump into the pool?

A: It wanted to become a watermelon.

Q: What did the watermelon say to the cantaloupe?

A: You’re one in a melon.

Q: How are a car and a bicycle similar?

A: You can’t make watermelon juice out of either of them.

Q: How does Homer Simpson say watermelon in French?

A: Melon D’OH.

Q: What do you get when you cross a watermelon with broccoli?

A: A melon-coli snack!

Q: What do you get when you slice a watermelon in four pieces?

A: A quartermelon!
 
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Q: What do you call a watermelon that spends all day at the beauty spa?

A: Hottermmelon.

Q: What do you get when you cross a watermelon with broccoli?

A: A melon-coli snack!
watermelon jokes for kids question: What do you get when you cross a watermelon with broccoli? A: A melon-coli snack! on a red background

Q: What was the watermelon’s naughty pick-up line?

A: Want to see my melons?

Q: Where does the Roman stop eating his watermelon?

A: At the Rhine.

If there is watermelon why isn’t there firemelon and airmelon and earthmelon.

You know…the four elemelons.

The watermelon plant didn’t like sharing a garden with passion vines; but they started to grow on him.

There was a farmer who grew watermelons. He was doing pretty well, but he was disturbed by some local kids who would sneak into his watermelon patch at night and eat his watermelons. After some careful thought, he came up with a clever idea that he thought would scare the kids away for sure. He made up a sign and posted it in the field. The next day, the kids show up and they saw the sign which read, “Warning! One of the watermelons in this field has been injected with cyanide.” The kids ran off, made up their own sign and posted it next to the farmer’s sign. When the farmer returned, he surveyed the field.

He noticed that no watermelons are missing, but the sign next to his read, “Now there are two!”

So a group of cacti walk past a couple of watermelons.

The cacti say “wow, nice melons!”

The watermelons reply “what a bunch of pricks.”

What sort of monsters don’t eat the crust?

I mean it’s fantastic even if it doesn’t taste like the rest of the watermelon.
 
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“I wish I had the money to buy a million watermelons…”

“What will you do with a million watermelons?”

“I don’t want the watermelons, I just want the money.”

A watermelon proposes to a honeydew melon and says “honey, I love you and I just can’t wait to get married.
Let’s just run off to the farmers market and get it done.”

And the melon says, “baby I love you too, but I just cantaloupe”

The watermelon is 50% water.

The other 50% is melon.
watermelon jokes for kids question: The watermelon is 50% water. The other 50% is melon.  on a black background

Got some other funny watermelon jokes for kids? Share in the comments so we can add them to the list!

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